And don't tell Harold. He wouldn't want me asking you this.
[Even if... it does help ease his mind, just a little. Having a plan, knowing someone will follow through with it with as much certainty as Accelerator has. Knowing it's not going to be up to him to know when to stop himself. If what he's talked about with Harold is true, then Hextech is far more dangerous than he expected. Sevika said it too- he thought she just didn't understand.
Any normal person would let it go at this point. But he's not going to do that.
He knows that about himself. It's been his obsession for most of his life. He can't lock it away in a box and let it go forever, even if it's dangerous. Hextech was about helping people- he's always said that- but it's also been about saving himself. If he had to live in a world where he couldn't work with magic in some way...
But there's magic here. Magic he could possibly use, and maybe it's different than the arcane he knows so well in Runeterra, but if it's safer then maybe... he can find something to focus on here, instead.]
[There's a beat as Accelerator debates leaving it there. It's enough, Jayce has trusted him a lot already and he isn't going to misuse what he's been offered.
.... Maybe he should trust him back, just a little?
He clicks his tongue and keeps typing.]
I asked Finch to be a contingency plan for me in case something ever happens. A mentally unstable esper can be really dangerous, and since I'm the strongest, that goes double for me. Short of Aurora, he's probably the only one here who could deal with me. He was ok with helping, but he wouldn't agree to killing me if I got out of hand.
His views on murder are a pain in the ass, but that's just who he is.
[He'll live with it. He doesn't want Harold to change.]
cw: still talking about child murder and also adult murder
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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You're not the first person to ask me to do this kind of thing, dumbass. It's fine.
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Of the people here?
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Okay. On two conditions. One, if Viktor isn't here. Two, if I'm going to hurt someone.
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Why would it matter whether Viktor is here?
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If there's ever something that gets me to the point I'm talking about, Viktor would set me straight.
[more allegations he's not beating]
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[That's both gay and reasonable. He has no idea of Jayce realizes that but whatever.]
Okay, both of those conditions are fine with me. No Viktor around and if you're going to hurt someone.
cw: suicidal ideation
[Even if... it does help ease his mind, just a little. Having a plan, knowing someone will follow through with it with as much certainty as Accelerator has. Knowing it's not going to be up to him to know when to stop himself. If what he's talked about with Harold is true, then Hextech is far more dangerous than he expected. Sevika said it too- he thought she just didn't understand.
Any normal person would let it go at this point. But he's not going to do that.
He knows that about himself. It's been his obsession for most of his life. He can't lock it away in a box and let it go forever, even if it's dangerous. Hextech was about helping people- he's always said that- but it's also been about saving himself. If he had to live in a world where he couldn't work with magic in some way...
But there's magic here. Magic he could possibly use, and maybe it's different than the arcane he knows so well in Runeterra, but if it's safer then maybe... he can find something to focus on here, instead.]
cw: talking about child murder
[There's a beat as Accelerator debates leaving it there. It's enough, Jayce has trusted him a lot already and he isn't going to misuse what he's been offered.
.... Maybe he should trust him back, just a little?
He clicks his tongue and keeps typing.]
I asked Finch to be a contingency plan for me in case something ever happens. A mentally unstable esper can be really dangerous, and since I'm the strongest, that goes double for me. Short of Aurora, he's probably the only one here who could deal with me. He was ok with helping, but he wouldn't agree to killing me if I got out of hand.
His views on murder are a pain in the ass, but that's just who he is.
[He'll live with it. He doesn't want Harold to change.]
cw: still talking about child murder and also adult murder
[Which probably seems contradictory, considering what he's asking for.]
How could he stop you?
[Unless it's with The Power Of Friendship or something, he's failing to see how someone like Harold could actually "deal" with him.]
cw: still talking about child murder and also adult murder
[Harold just isn't a pushover when it comes to his morals.....
He will not type that thought out.]
That's none of your fucking business and not part of the point I was making.
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Right. I'll be as objective as I can be.